With Everything

I find myself in the same place again, the familiar scent and taste of the rough, the funk. Listening to “With Everything” by Hillsong and reading an article on Relevantmagazine.com, I have reached this place of needing God to do the supernatural in my life. Much of my life story revolves around His faithfulness in delivering me from nonsense that honestly can’t be explained how it even got there. Approximately 5 years ago, my heart was torn and my life turned upside-down. I asked God to tear me apart, to break me down and make me the person that He wants me to be. He did exactly that. But I asked for more than I could handle. I didn’t understand why Christ would allow me to go through what I went through. In fact, I still don’t. But I have rest in the peace that through those turn of events, He has led me to where I need to be today. Today is just a regular day so the previous statement isn’t followed up by a great testimony. However, in my head, my heart, I know there’s a testimony being written, one that I may not comprehend or read until I meet my Savior.

Through these years, Christmas has been the hardest. It’s the season that everyone is supposed to be joyous because of the gifts, love and laughter. I’m not a scrooge in any sense but it is definitely a hard season to go through once again in emotional unease. The year of 2009 could be described by several distinguishable events; Huge Turbine Outage that cost well over $10Mil, New Church Plant, Traveling band, a new old house in the heart of Uptown New Orleans and 3 relationships that did not quite work out. Somehow, reflecting upon these, the obvious is that the positives outweigh the negatives. But 3 relationships? Ones that no one knows of because I’m not the type of person who likes to share a good news unless I know for sure that it’s a definite. Call it guarding my privacy, but I rather shed the light of Christ that it’s the centrality of my pride. It’s humiliating. Granted these relationships still mean a lot to me and they each dwell under my friends list on Facebook. But for the most part, the most significant downturn is the unchangeable, undeniable reason that I am who I am. So the question then leads to who am I? Is being a child of God not enough in this society? Is being a professional Engineer in a well-renown utility plant not enough? Is being a “father” to many under my leadership in Lifegroup not enough? How much more can the world ask for?

Sitting here again, I’m embracing the thought of going through yet another wintery Christmas by myself. Not physically since I do have some friends and family but thoroughly emotionally and mentally. I honestly don't give a damn because it's not about me anyway. This year has been draining for those 2 aspects of my life. But I am reminded greatly that Jesus is my God and His majesty deserves ALL my praise despite how drained or poured out I am. Life is unfair. It treated Christ the same way with it’s cruelty. In the words of Misty Edwards on how the world has tagged her, I found an inspiration, a motivation to keep crawling on these bloody knees.
“My focus is to go deep in the Word of God; live in the First Commandment, which leads to the Second; stay faithful in the place of prayer; fast more; give more; and live the Sermon-on-the-Mount lifestyle to the highest degree, even in my weakness. I know I am going to die one day, and the only real definition of who I am will come from the lips of Him who searches my heart.”

Taming the beast

Just a quick note. Gustav was not even the beast here in New Orleans (Thank God). But I do have to admit part of my adrenaline-junkie was a little disappointed. Nonetheless, I'm appreciative of us being spared from its wrath. Thanks to all who kept me and my crew in their thoughts and prayer. Ike then threaten NOLA a little but was definitely aiming for Houston. Deja Vu of Katrina and Rita.

I'm sick of talking about the storms. Looking forward to the Fall season. The weather is already cooling down and I'm loving every minute of it with my windows rolled down.

However, since the storm, there's this other beast that has emerged it's ugly head in the surface of my life. It's the beast that many would have names such as matters, situation, mood, negativity, problems, etc. I have come to learned this week that I have allowed it to define who I am and how I react to my days. The moment I allow it to dwell around for a moment, it is when I see it engulf my entire day to slug. I have to constantly renew my mind by reminding myself how great the day is and not allow it to bring me down. It's a tough feat when I'm constantly battling crap at work, relationships, my house hunting situation, and my company. It's also another dejavu of how my life was approximately a year ago. I do feel myself spread thin and I'm starting to lose sight of the quality of life.
I can vividly remember how it was like right after Katrina. Have I improved since then. Maybe. But I'm gonna fight harder against this beast. It's a matter of perspective and mind. It takes initiative. I have to intentionally desire to win over it.

This past 2 weeks' score is Edmund 0 : Beast 2. Watch for a come back for week 3. I'm about to tear it apart!!!!!

Arrival of Hurricane Gustav

What a night. It was considerably peaceful compared to Katrina. All night long, we were fighting to keep both of the large units on (1500MW Total). These units are some of the main supplier to the New Orleans Metro area. Around midnight, we were ordered to placed all units on Oil. This is because all gas lines are shut off coming in from the Gulf during hurricane threats. For an hour or so, I was helping some of the operators and maintenance personnel to swap out the gas guns with the oil guns. We managed to keep both units on.

I was awakened by the howling of the wind at about 8:30am eventhough I worked all night. But this gave me a good opportunity to capture some of the footage above. Maximum winds were approximately 110 mph in some of the heavier squalls out over the water according to our gauges. We just might have dodged the bullet. But is the worst over?

Hurricane Gustav Pre-Landfall Sunday 8-31-08

Mandatory Evacuation as of Sunday 8-31-08. Streets were empty. Uptown felt like a Ghost Town as I rode in to work. Storm Clouds footage were taken on top of the boiler tower around 7:30PM. Started storming around 7:50PM.

Hurricane Gustav - Prediction of Cat 5

Just finished loading up the trailer along with my fellow Vintage Brethrens with water and relief supplies. They will be heading out tomorrow for the Northshore. I love the hearts of these guys. Rob Wilton, pastor and friend, after saying goodbye to his wife and newborn son who are safe in South Carolina now, only has one thing on his mind... "How can we get back in time to help out the Uptown community?" This is why I am in New Orleans with these guys. 

Just to let you guys know, I will be reporting in to my power plant at 6:30PM tomorrow and will be on duty during the storm. It is predicted to hit Monday. Mandatory evactuation has been called. Apparently this is the "Mother of all storms" according to Mayor Ray Nagin. 

I will be keeping an update through my twitter updates (SMS Text). 

Thanks for your prayers and God bless New Orleans. 

8-29-08: 3 years since Katrina

Today we remember the devastating Hurricane Katrina that tore through the city, releasing her wrath with no mercy 3 years ago. Much have been improved and you can see the relentless fight that the locals have put up. New Orleans has a rich culture that has been around for many centuries. Somehow it leaves me to wonder how did my predecessors pull it through all these years? After Katrina, many believed that it was an astronomic event that happens every 30 years. At least that was the common trend that they saw. Now 3 years since Katrina, Gustav is predicted to finish up what Katrina left. 

Have we really messed up the chemistry of Earth? Has the green house effect finally reached the peak? Will New Orleans survive another Storm the size of Katrina? Will the city fight back AGAIN? 

As always, I will be on duty at my power plant. Good ol' Entergy. This time around, I believe the leaders of the company are more prepared than before. We have all learned so much from Katrina. Hence, I would like you to know that I will be in New Orleans as we await Gustav's arrival to help keep the power on for the city, on and after the storm. Do I consider this a noble task? Truly so, but I only count myself as blessed to be the few chosen to have the opportunity to serve this city that I have been called to. I will be joining up with my brethrens from Vintage Church after the storm as soon as I am released from work to help the Uptown community with the restoration process. At least this is optimism. The optimism to fight for the city to come back. Again. 

Please pray for the Pankhurst

I was on my way back from Alexandria, North Louisiana when I received this text from a dear friend: "Please pray for my family. Our house burned down today."

About 2 days ago, Melissa text me amusingly apologizing for sending Fay's post-product to New Orleans. (She lives in Jacksonville, FL where Fay made landfall). Somehow that conversation led to me warning her to be careful with the candles as it is one of the biggest reason why some of the houses caught on fire during Katrina. We laughed at the fact that she was keeping herself occupied by burning things. Needless to say, getting that text was not funny at all.

I just received a call from her as she's buying some clothes from Walmart for tomorrow. She told me that everyone is okay, which is the most important thing. The root cause of the fire was not due to candles, thank God. A faulty electric circuit triggered this event. Nobody was home during that time except the pets, which didn't make it. The Fire department reported that it was very smoky and that luckily nobody was in the house. I don't think it's luck. I believe God to be in it. Despite being a tragic, Melissa is in a very positive spirit but she will need all the prayer and support that we can offer. God will be glorified through this tragic.

As this is happening, I am also receiving emails from work regard Gustav, a potential Cat 3 Hurricane that could make it's treacherous path towards New Orleans. We are getting ready in case Gustav does decide to hit New Orleans. The ironic part is we will be marking the 3rd year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina this Friday. God is and will still be in control.